Baby Steps

Please forgive me for the lapse in postings!

I wanted to share some of the steps that I have taken and still take daily to keep moving forward. A few different times over the past few months I have heard the statement, "you can't move forward if you are constantly looking in the rearview mirror". Does that mean we can never revisit our past? No. God never wastes a hurt or a victory, so our story is part of how we can minister to others and find the grace and mercy to hear from others in a compassionate way. But it does mean that we should not live in our past. We should not dwell there. We should not plant our feet there. God says to keep our eyes on Him.

1. I had to have a repentant heart.
Psalm 51: 10, 17
"Create in me a clean heart, O God. Renew a loyal spirit within me." (v10)
"The sacrifice you desire is a broken spirit. You will not reject a broken and repentant heart, O God." (v17)

2. I had to reach out for help and accept it. It is hard to admit, confess, or tell people what is going on in your life sometimes. Who wants to admit they feel helpless or defeated? Who wants to tell others "what we have done"? God wants us to. God already knows and he still loves us. God put amazing people in my life to fight along side with me. They prayed for me. Encouraged me. They spoke truth to me even when I didn't want to hear it. They let me cry my eyes out and tell them how much I hated myself and my life...they listened to me weep probably more then they thought they could stand!

3. I had to seperate what happened to me from who I was. I had to seperate the lies from the truth. This was a big one. And I will expand on this point later. But what I will say is that I was encouraged to do this by my counselor and I think it was one of the biggest turning points for me.

4. I memorize scriptured and then apply it to my life regardless of how I felt. I asked God to lead me to specific scriptures. I wrote them down and began memorizing them. I picked them apart and asked God to reveal what He wanted me to hear from Him through those specific scriptures. A great scripture to start with is Philippians 4:8 "Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things taht are excellent and worth of praise." Every time I said "I am a terrible person (and that is being nice)", I then had to say "is that a true or lovely thought?" It is a great scripture to start checking yourself against in the things you think or say.

5. I read my bible and journaled. I do this anyway, but it was so important for me to start my day with my bible and my journal. I also read Godly books that applied to my situation.

6. I did it anyway. What I mean by that is, I had to do things against my learned behavior. I had to eat when I didn't want to. I had to believe God's Word when I didn't believe in my heart yet that God felt that way about ME. I had to do it anyway. I had to believe it anyway. I had to do what the professionals said even if I didn't want to. If my dietician said I had to eat a certain amount, I had to believe she was the expert and I wasn't. If God said he loved me, I had to believe my Creator. If my counselor gave me an assignment, I did it even if I didn't want to go that far yet. Believe our Creator. Trust the professionals.

7. I had to learn that some days were going to be hard. That there would be up days and down days, but regardless of how I felt I had to move forward. Some days I turned all the way around and walk backward, but I had to understand that God could turn me back around and I COULD move forward again. I had to expect hard days. No matter who we are, we are all going to come to hard days...even if you've never gone through any trials in your life (which I highly doubt that is anyone!).

8. Deciding what I stood for. As I grew up I did not have a standard that I stood for. I just lived, made decisions based on my hurt and pain, and lived with what ever came my way. I had to make a decision to decide what I wanted my life to reflect. Of course I wanted to reflect God. Later I will expand on this step, but I choose three specific traits I wanted to reflect. The three are Integrity, Character, and Servant with God as the center of all of these. I now could go back to each decision I was making or thought I was having and say, "Does this reflect my integrity as a believer?" "Does this reflect Godly character?" "Does this allow me to be God's servant?" They became and are my checkpoint right now.

9. KEEP MY EYES ON JESUS at all times! Pray, Pray, Pray.

Each of these steps is a blog on it's own. I am sure I will be diving in to each during the next few weeks.

These steps developed over time. They were and are a process. Some took and take longer to apply. If you are at a place where one of these steps can help, choose one today and start. Ask God what is one thing you can to today that will be helpful.

I know God has great plans for you. I know this because He states it in scripture. "For I know the plans I have for you," says the Lord. 'They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope." That is a promise from the one who created you!

In love, Teresa